Monday, Aug 30 2010

Oi Família!

So school started already? I cannot believe it! I want to hear about everyone´s first day! I already heard about Jessica´s fiasco with the schedule haha don´t worry, I did almost the same thing so it happens to the best of us! I was thinking about you guys all week long hoping that you´re first days of school were fantastic!
So this week was definitely a learning experience. So we did a last minute division with my District Leader this Thursday. His name is Elder Chad and he is one awesome missionary. He and I have been pretty good friends here on the mission because he lives in the same house as us and we talk about basketball all the time. I have been waiting to do splits with him for a while because I knew that I would learn a lot from him. Well, to start off the day, I completely lost ourselves on the streets trying to find a few inactive members so it was a good start to the day. Then we almost couldn´t find where the house where our lunch was, and then we had to stop by the chapel really quick for something... and I broke the key inside of the door, so we couldn´t get in. Then all of our other appointments fell through and then I got really down on myself. Elder Chad could tell that I wasn´t having a good day, so we stopped for a while and we talked about somethings that were just bothering me. We talked about what was really eating at me and I found out that it was really because I am afraid that my Heavenly Father is disappointed in me when things aren´t going so well. I know that I am supposed to be here working my hardest, and when things fall through, I feel like He is not happy with my work. That has been my theme for almost my whole life. I love to make my parents proud; whenever I did something that made you guys smile, I got the biggest joy out of it. It´s the same thing with my Father in Heaven; I want so badly that he is proud of the work I´m doing out here. After that day, I really felt like I had let Him down and it really got to me. Elder Chad told to me really pray for help that night and he gave me some advice on how to not get so down on myself. I was reading the very next morning in the book of Ether in the Book of Mormon in chapter 12. I read two verses in particular that helped me. The first was where is says the Lord gives and shows us our weaknesses so that we rely on Him for everything and thus we are made stronger through Him. So I prayed for His complete guidance and help that day. The next verse talked about how blessings only come after the trial of faith. I was so depressed after that one day and felt like I had let God down, but the very next day I felt like He had put a big arm around me and told me that everything was okay. We taught 11 lessons the next day and found more people to teach this week! Through the power of the Holy Ghost, I realized that if am doing my very best and keeping all of the mission rules, my Heavenly Father is proud of me. Just how you have only asked that I do my best and you´d be happy with me, my Heavenly Father is saying the same thing. I want everyone here to have this feeling of love and comfort from God, so I will be working twice as hard this week!
I love you all and I hope you all had a great time at school this week! I hope that this week is twice as good! Oh and Mom and Dad, I don´t know if there was a problem with my email or something, but I didn´t get a message from either of you two this week. I love you both with all my heart and I am so greatful for the things that you taught me! I love being a missionary! I am learning so much. Have a great week! Love you!

Elder Clark